Rethinking Masculinity with bell hooks

There’s a lot going on with being a man in the modern world. Especially for my generation, ‘Gen Z’, we are in a strange place with how we think about our gender and where we fit in the world. And that’s great! It’s good to think about what’s going on with who you are and think about it. Though for many, it can be hard to get a good start on this journey. Many go down the rabbit hole of toxic masculinity or conforming to stereotypes that end up damaging yourself over actually improving your life. That’s where bell hooks¹ book ‘The Will to Change’ comes in.

‘The Will to Change’ describes the way men and males have been abused by the patriarchy and how they can change themselves for the better. It goes over the ways boys were targeted by mass media, systems around us, and even other people by the looks given to them when they were young. She then goes onto explain how men can reconnect to their emotional selves to break away from these roles and become better people.

As a man myself, I found the topics bell hooks covered to be extremely interesting. She has an extreme amount of empathy for men, despite all the horrible things done to her. Yet she still goes over the point that it is up to men to fix these issues. She is simply shining a light on these, it is up to the males to fix it. Many of the solutions she offers are also important, going over reconnecting to your emotional self, to be vulnerable and let go of the mask society has put on you. Women can guide them, but the men can’t change without committing to it themselves.

And as I look at the world now, about how men in my generation look up to grifters and horrible people who believe that the real reason men suffer is because of women (they don’t), I think hook’s message is more important than ever before. The people who claim to want to help men are just doing it to get two things: money, and power. They don’t benefit from emotionally connected men who are able to think for themselves. They want customers. hooks calmly and clearly explains what patriarchy actually does to men, and how they can break away from that to become their true selves, without compromising on their manhood.

If you know a man who is interested in breaking away from their assigned role as a man, or a man who just wants to be better, give them a copy of this book. Help them understand how they can improve themselves in a way that will actually save them.

Image selected from Pexels Free Photos